


The Hope of Being Sun-Kissed

by mitana



Series: Stay in the Car Chronicles [5]
Category: Scarecrow and Mrs. King
Genre: F/M, First Time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-02
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-13 09:13:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29151039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mitana/pseuds/mitana
Summary: Lee and Amanda become partners in every sense of the word.
Relationships: Amanda King/Lee Stetson
Series: Stay in the Car Chronicles [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2137956
Comments: 1
Kudos: 5





	The Hope of Being Sun-Kissed

**Author's Note:**

> After the last installment, I thought we all needed a good shot of Lee and Amanda together. (You still have to get through the Joe part first, though.) Set February 1986, after The Eyes Have It. The first part got a little wordy, but I wanted to give a little backstory for contrast. 
> 
> Mature rating may be too high, but wanted to stay on the safe side. Probably more like a strong T rather than M.

_Disclaimer: I don’t own Scarecrow and Mrs. King. No copyright infringement is intended._

* * *

She and Joe had waited. Sure, there had been some fooling around, and some heavy make-out sessions. But they had saved the main event for their wedding night. Some of her friends hadn’t, and so she had heard several fairly graphic first-hand accounts. She had also read some more scientific descriptions, and was quite well-informed of the biological aspects of it. She had already been to her gynecologist and discussed forms of birth control, since she and Joe didn’t really want to become parents while Joe was still in school. Her mother’s ‘talk’ had sort of bridged the gap between the scientifically technical and the luridly graphic, and Amanda supposed she was lucky she had a mother who believed in frank talk rather than vaguely flowering descriptions. Although, she really could have done without the personal tidbits her mother threw in (she was still trying to get the—ugh— _images_ out of her head and hoped that nothing popped back into her brain during her wedding night experience).

She felt suitably well-informed and was prepared to follow what she thought was probably her mother’s best piece of advice: just be open with each other and let the love they had for each other guide them. (Closely followed by her second-best piece of advice, which was to make sure she peed afterward to avoid getting a bladder infection—Amanda shuddered at the memory of her mother calling it ‘honeymooner’s disease’—how embarrassing!)

She had dreamed of her wedding night, imagining that it would be like her solo explorations but—well, _more_. She certainly enjoyed the heavy petting she and Joe had engaged in, so she figured that was a good indication that she would enjoy the actual act. When she imagined the combination of the two activities, she grew quite excited and was looking forward to it, if a bit nervously.

When the big night arrived, she was as ready as she could be. Following her mother’s best piece of advice, she was honest about what she liked and tried to follow his cues, too. This was _Joe_ , her best friend and the man she loved. It was sweet, it was loving, it was intimate, it was exciting. It was also somewhat awkward, fairly messy, and briefly painful. She assumed that with practice, it would become more of the former four, and less of the latter three.

On the whole, she found she enjoyed it quite a bit. It made her feel closer to Joe both emotionally and physically. She also found the increase in non-sexual touch to be something she especially liked. There was just something about being able to put your hands (or mouth) on your partner during everyday moments that appealed to her sense of intimacy; whether it was a quick shoulder-rub, a kiss to the forehead, or a teasing smack on the butt. Each one was a reminder that they belonged to each other, that they had exclusive permission to touch each other like that, and that they _wanted_ to be close enough to touch.

When Joe took the job with the EAO, she missed the various intimacies of marriage. She missed the sex, but it seemed like the more he was gone, the less she missed it. If she really felt the urge for release, she could deal with that on her own. What she _really_ decided she missed were the non-sexual touches: the brushing back of the hair on the forehead, the quick hug in passing, the snuggling on the couch. 

When the marriage ended in divorce, she figured it would be a while before she got close enough to anyone else to experience anything like what she had enjoyed with Joe.

**SMK**

The divorce had been finalized for less than a year when she started dating Dean; she was still trying to find herself as an independent person after Joe when she had literally run into Dean on the sidewalk outside the grocery store. He had asked her out, and she had accepted. The following several dates were all casual and conducted in public. Eventually, she’d invited him over to the house to meet her mother and the boys. It seemed like things were moving forward in a positive fashion; they held hands and kissed, and they had even gone away together once, but the trip had remained strictly platonic. Amanda was fine with the pace of the relationship. Dean was patient, as well, and their dates got a bit more romantic. But still, Amanda just couldn’t bring herself to become any closer than a little firelight and wine at her house (with her boys and mother right upstairs) would allow. 

The introduction of Lee into her life didn’t change things with Dean, at least not at first. Lee was such an outlier in her life that his presence didn’t much affect her day-to-day functioning. Eventually, however, her calm, pleasant, slowly-moving relationship with Dean began to feel like a non-relationship. She spent less time with him, sometimes forgot about him, and was somewhat bored when she was around him. Thinking about what she had told Joe was the primary reason for marriage, companionship, she realized that she didn’t really want to be around Dean anymore. It felt like a chore to make time for him, and that wasn’t fair to either of them. She eventually broke it off with him, and she didn’t feel like much had changed in her life with him gone.

Lee, however, was a completely different matter. He was intrusive, and troublesome, and frustrating. He was always popping up unexpectedly and getting them into situations that pushed the limits of what she was comfortable with, like pretending to be married, or kissing her undercover, or hugging her after some life-threatening event. She was not immune to his charm, either, no matter how she acted; she just wasn’t going to fall all over him like all the other women in his life. And she had remained true to her resolve to always speak her mind, which had caused several disagreements, but at least she felt that everything always stayed honest between them.

As time went by, she began to think that Lee actually valued her honesty and the fact that she didn’t just blindly do what he told her. Yes, it frustrated him when she didn’t stay in the car (or wherever else he told her to stay), but she knew that was an extension of his concern for her, so she really couldn’t hold that against him. He saw her as a person first and a woman second, which most of the time suited her just fine.

It was the touches that made her regret that he usually didn’t see her as a woman. Oh, he _knew_ she was a woman (she didn’t see him hugging or putting his hand on the back of any men), but not _that kind_ of woman. He didn’t see her sexually, and she was of two minds about that. She really did appreciate that he seemed to value her brain and personality beyond her physical appearance. But taking into account his (admittedly gorgeous) looks, his charm, and his reputation, then combining that with his touches—all his hand-holding, kissing, arm around her shoulders, _carrying_ (she really wished she could have been conscious for that) that occurred undercover—and the ones that they engaged in in their daily lives—a hug when she was afraid, his hand on her lower back to escort her as they walked—she couldn’t help but wonder, and regret.

Regret that he didn’t see her as a sexual being, and wonder what it would be like if he did. 

It was also the touches that gave him away when his view started to change. Little things, at first. Like him reaching out and waiting for her to take his hand as they walked; putting his hands on hers as they sat at a table and talked; putting his arm around her shoulders and squeezing in a sideways, one-armed hug. And then there were the ‘contact-free’ touches, which she nevertheless felt… The smiles that reached his eyes and made her warm all over, the occasional wink that gave her a little frisson of delight down her spine, the _leaning_ that put him just that much more into her personal space and _felt_ oh-so- _personal._

After October, when Lee had admitted that she was his best friend (and she had admitted that he was hers), things had changed. The touches had become more overt; he had been more willing to show his care and affection. They had gone out to dinner and held hands throughout the meal (the fact that he was left-handed allowed it if they sat side-by-side). When he came over to the house, he sat closely beside her on the couch, shoulders touching. He brushed her hair back from her face sometimes, using it as an excuse to gently caress her cheek.

By the end of November, they had added small kisses to their repertoire of touches. In fact, it seemed that they couldn’t keep their hands off each other.

In December, when they pretended to be married for the Marvelous Marvin’s case, their relationship progressed to more sensual caressing and longer, deeper kisses. They even slept in the same bed, with Lee’s arms around her as they slept. He had been a perfect gentleman, but she had been acutely aware of the step that they were taking, anyway. They had both been tired, but he had been spooned up behind her; their bodies touched from chest to feet. It had been a long time since she had been in bed with a man. She couldn’t help but imagine what might happen the next time she shared one with Lee.

The week following the Marvin’s case was Christmas. Lee was on the duty roster for Christmas Eve, but Amanda had convinced him to come over for Christmas Day dinner. Actually, it might have been her mother and the boys insisting on it that had made the difference in his decision to go. He spent the evening helping Amanda with the food and dishes, playing with Philip and Jamie on their new video game system, and talking with Dotty and Joe, who he had decided was actually a pretty good guy, ever since Amanda had reassured him that there was no possibility of her getting back together with her ex. The crowning moment of the evening was orchestrated by Dotty, who had sneakily placed mistletoe in several key areas; Lee and Amanda kissed for all the family (and Joe) to see, and their ‘relationship,’ in the eyes of her family, had begun.

It was two months before all the hidden, unspoken emotions were voiced, before they both admitted their true feelings. That evening might have progressed to a consummation of their love, if not for where they were, and—the interruption. Bad guys sure knew how to ruin a moment.

Valentine’s Day was a wash because Lee had suddenly left the country. When he came back, he was attacked, and then they had to save the Barnstorm List. Afterward, Lee was given doctor’s orders for five days of rest and relaxation, and Billy gave Amanda a temporary AOS 16 Status so she could make sure he followed the doctor’s orders.

**SMK**

Despite Lee’s protestations that he was fine, he did suffer some aftereffects from his concussion. After leaving the Agency, she dropped him off at his apartment, then made a quick shopping trip. Returning to his apartment, she found him sitting on the couch, eyes closed, head leaned back. After putting away the groceries, she sat down next to him and lightly brushed the hair off his forehead. 

“Mmm.” Lee opened his eyes and gave her a tired smile.

“I think you should go lie down on the bed and rest while I make you some chicken noodle soup.” She continued to run her fingers through his hair.

“Oh, Amanda, I’m fine.”

She gave him a disbelieving look. “You were asleep when I came in.”

“I wasn’t sleeping. I was just resting my eyes.”

“Lee Stetson, don’t make me pull rank on you.”

He raised his eyebrows. “You wouldn’t.”

“Just go lie down and you won’t have to find out.”

He wiggled his eyebrows at her. “You could come rest with me.”

“Well then, who would make the soup?”

“We could order takeout.”

She shook her head. “No, I’m making you soup. I already bought all the ingredients. Now, come on.” She stood up and pulled on his hands, encouraging him to stand.

He sighed. “Oh, alright.” He stood up, grabbing her hand as his equilibrium shifted.

She held more tightly to his hands, then put her arm around his chest and under his shoulders. They walked to his bedroom and she helped him off with his shoes. As he leaned back against the pillows, she sat down on the mattress next to him. Running her hands through his hair once again, she then placed her hand on his cheek. She leaned down and gave him a soft kiss.

“Rest. I’ll come check on you in a little while.” With a final peck on his lips, she stood up and walked toward the door.

“Amanda.”

She turned back and looked at him with raised eyebrows.

“I love you.”

The brightness that appeared in her eyes at those words just gave him another reason to love her.

“I love you, too, Lee.”

A little while later, the chicken soup simmering fragrantly on the stove, Amanda went in to check on Lee. He was asleep, as she expected. With a soft smile, she left the room. She’d let him sleep for a while longer.

**SMK**

After finishing their early dinner of chicken noodle soup, they sat on the couch, softly discussing the last few days. Seeing that Lee still looked a bit tired (the doctors had said that might be a lingering symptom), she scooted over toward the arm of the couch and encouraged him to lie down and put his head in her lap. 

When he was settled, she began to run her fingers through his hair again.

He closed his eyes. “Mmm. Feels good.”

Amanda smiled. She continued the conversation they’d been having before she moved, but after a few minutes, he was asleep again. Continuing to thread his hair through her fingers, she leaned her head back and closed her eyes. She was tired, too, after the night in the hospital with Lee and all the stress and worry about him. Last night’s sleep wasn’t enough after all that. Soon she was dozing, too, her hand dropping onto her thigh next to Lee’s head.

She woke up a while later and looked at the time. She’d been asleep about 45 minutes. It was time to move, before she got stiff from staying in the same place for too long.

She put her hand on his shoulder and rubbed it lightly. “Lee. Lee, Sweetheart? We need to move off this couch.”

“Amanda…?” His voice sounded a bit confused. “Where--?”

“We fell asleep on the couch.”

He smiled, still half asleep. “I like sleeping with you.”

She swallowed and closed her eyes, silently asking God for the strength to resist the charm exuded by sleepy, loving, Lee. Taking a deep breath, she opened her eyes and smiled down at him. “I’m glad to hear it.”

He grinned, then moved to sit up. Amanda assisted him, and in a moment, he was sitting next to her. He reached up and brushed her hair back from her face. “We’ve barely had a chance to see each other, lately. I’m sorry I missed Valentine’s Day.”

She shook her head. “Don’t be sorry. There’ll be other Valentine’s Days. I’m just glad you’re okay and that everyone on the Barnstorm list is safe.”

His eyes glistened as he heard her words. Did she realize what she was implying?

He leaned toward her and pulled her into his arms, placing his hand on the side of her head and cradling it to him when she pressed her cheek to his chest. “I love you so much.”

She squeezed him tightly, relishing the feeling of being in his arms. “Oh, Lee. I love you, too.”

He dropped a kiss on the top of her head. She was so amazing. To have that much faith in him, in _them_ , that she behaved like it was a foregone conclusion that they would be together for more Valentine’s Days…

After a few minutes, she pulled away and looked into his beautiful hazel eyes. “How are you feeling?”

He smiled back. “Pretty good right now. I can’t think of anywhere I’d rather be than right here with you.”

She sighed. “Who needs Valentine’s Day when you’re so romantic every day?”

“Hey, don’t knock Valentine’s Day. I’m counting on your promise that we’ll have more of them together…”

Her eyes widened, her cheeks flushing. “I guess I did say that, didn’t I?”

“You’re not backing out now, are you?”

She shook her head. “I wouldn’t dream of it.”

He hugged her once more, then stood up and went into the kitchen to get a drink of water. “Want anything?”

She stood up and followed him. “No, I’m good.”

“Hey, do you need to check on the boys or anything?”

“No, they know where I am, and Mother has your number if she needs to get in touch with me.”

He nodded. “How are they doing?”

“When I left this morning, they were fine. They were worried about you.”

He put down his glass of water. “About me? Why?”

“Because they like you. And I told them you had been injured in our car accident.” She placed her hand on top of his. “You’re going to have to get used to having people care about you.”

A small smile formed on his lips. “Yeah, I guess I am.”

Amanda patted his hand. “I’ve got an idea. I’ll call over there so they can talk to you and see that you’re okay.” She looked in his eyes. “If that’s okay with you…?”

“Uh, sure. If you think they’d like that.”

“They’d _love_ that.”

They went back out to the living room and Amanda called her house number. Her mother answered and was the first one to talk to Lee.

Amanda just sat and listened as Lee spoke with her mother and then with each of the boys. She enjoyed listening to his end of each conversation and trying to figure out what was being said on the other end. She smiled whenever Lee laughed, which was quite a lot. Finally, he handed her the phone. “Your mother wants to speak with you.”

Lee listened to her side of the conversation.

“Yes, Mother. Okay. Yes, I’ll tell him. Alright. See you in a little while. I love you, too. Goodbye.”

When she hung up, she looked at him with a smile. “See, I told you they’d love talking to you.”

He pulled her to him and wrapped his arms around her waist. “And you were right, as usual.”

She laughed. “Can I get that in writing?”

He reviewed what he had said, then barked out a laugh. “No. I’m not giving you that kind of ammunition.”

They chuckled together, then by mutual consent, they leaned together and engaged in a long, sensual, toe-curling kiss. As they pulled their lips apart, they both sighed. 

“I love you.” Amanda proclaimed as she disengaged from Lee’s embrace.

“And I love you, Amanda.”

She smiled lovingly at him, then sighed. “I guess I should get going… As long as you think you’ll be okay overnight by yourself.”

“I’ll be fine. I’m sure a full night’s sleep in my bed will get me back to one hundred percent.”

She placed her hand on his cheek and kissed his lips briefly. “Okay. You’re sure?”

“I’m sure.”

She gathered her purse and jacket from the hall closet and Lee took the jacket from her so he could assist her into it. After she had it on, he freed her hair from the collar and kissed her on the tip of her nose.

“Oh, what did your mother want you to tell me?”

“What—? Oh, on the phone? She said she made you some cookies and I could bring them over here tomorrow.”

He smiled. “That was nice of her.”

“Well, she likes you.”

“Mmm. I like her, too. But I like her daughter more.” He gave her another quick kiss. “You should get going,” he said, regretfully.

She nodded. “I’ll be back tomorrow morning as soon as I drop the boys off at school.”

“Amanda, you don’t really have to do that. Billy was—”

“Billy was right to make you take the time off and have me watch you. The lingering effects of concussions can be unpredictable. I’ll be here tomorrow morning.” She patted his hand. “I love you. Get some sleep.”

She opened the door and stepped through. 

Lee grabbed the door so she wouldn’t close it yet. “I love you.”

She smiled brightly at him, then left.

**SMK**

The next morning, Amanda opened the door with the key Lee had given her. Not hearing any sounds of movement, she placed the container of cookies on the counter, then hung up her jacket and purse in the closet and made her way toward the bedroom. She silently walked into the room, but he wasn’t in the bed. Puzzled, she went toward the bathroom. The door was open, and the lights were off.

She crept into the bathroom and was startled to find Lee sitting on the floor near the toilet, leaning against the wall with his eyes closed. “Lee?”

She rushed forward, concerned. As she squatted down next to him, he blinked his eyes open.

“Amanda?”

“I’m here, Lee. What happened?”

He let out a short groan. “I got up to go to the bathroom and afterwards, I got really dizzy. So, I sat down on the floor and closed my eyes. I must have fallen asleep.”

“How are you feeling now?”

“I think I’m okay.”

“Alright, well then, let’s get you up off the floor.”

She assisted him to his feet, making sure he was steady. When he seemed to be able to stand without help, she stepped back so he could leave the bathroom, and she preceded him into the bedroom. 

She made sure he was comfortable in his bed, then went out to the kitchen to make him a light breakfast. She knew he wasn’t a breakfast eater, but he’d recover more quickly if he had regular, healthy meals.

For most of the morning and afternoon, she took care of him, making sure he ate, talking to him, and just generally keeping him company. He had a headache for a while, but no more dizzy spells. Eventually, she convinced him to lie down for a nap. Before he fell asleep, she told him she was going to run home and take care of a few things, but that she would be back soon. 

He nodded, then closed his eyes. “I love you,” she whispered with a kiss to his forehead.

He smiled but didn’t open his eyes. “Love you, ‘Manda.”

**SMK**

When Lee woke up from his nap, he smelled something delicious. He stood up, made a quick stop in the bathroom, and made his way out to the living room. As he passed through the doorway, he noticed a small suitcase that he recognized as Amanda’s sitting against the wall.

“Smells delicious,” he commented as he saw Amanda sitting on the couch reading a book. 

“Thank you. It’s just a casserole I whipped up for dinner.” She kissed him as he sat down next to her. “How are you feeling, Sweetheart?”

“Pretty good at the moment.” He gestured toward the bedroom. “What’s with the suitcase?”

She blushed. “I mentioned to Mother that you had gotten dizzy during the night, and she suggested that I just stay here with you overnight for the next few days.”

“I like your mother more with every passing day.”

She giggled. “Besides me, I think she’s your biggest fan.”

“Oh?”

“She said I wasn’t to let you out of my sight, that she’d take care of the boys, and that I was to make sure that you were ‘well-taken-care-of.’”

His eyebrow raised, thinking how that statement could be perceived.

Amanda, obviously understanding the many possible meanings of her mother’s statement, blushed again. 

“So, having been given my orders by both Billy and my mother, I guess you’re stuck with me.” She grinned. “Oh, and I also have orders from the boys: We are to call every night before their bedtime so they can talk to both of us.”

He gave her a stern look, though Amanda could see that the corners of his lips were trying to curl up in a smile. “So, why are you willing to follow _their_ orders, but when _I_ ask you to stay in the car, you don’t?”

“Oh, that’s easy,” she answered, smiling shyly. “Their orders keep me close to you.”

He couldn’t even come up with anything in reply to that, her simple honesty and unconditional love completely undoing him.

He grabbed her and held her tightly to him, choking out, “Oh, Amanda.”

She didn’t know what she had said to make him so emotional, but she held on to him, cradling his head to her chest. She brushed the hair back from his temple and kissed it.

“I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve you. I love you, so, so much.” His words were a bit muffled as they were said against her sweater, but she understood the words, and she understood the sentiment.

She kissed his temple again. “I feel the same way, Sweetheart.”

They stayed in each other’s arms for a few more moments, until Lee’s stomach made a loud growl. Laughing, they separated.

“When’s that casserole going to be done? I’m starving.”

“Should be done any minute.” They got up from the couch and he followed her into the kitchen. She checked the timer, seeing that there were four minutes left, then opened the oven door to check how the casserole was doing. 

“Looks good. Let’s set the table.” Amanda took the plates out of the cupboard and Lee got the glasses and silverware. They set their two places, and the timer went off. Amanda got out the oven mitts from the drawer and removed the dish from the oven.

“It’ll need a few minutes to cool off before we can serve it. What would you like to drink?”

“I can get it, Amanda.” As alcohol was not recommended for people recovering from concussions, Lee got out the carton of milk and poured some into his glass, then into hers as she nodded in acceptance.

After a few minutes of quiet discussion, Amanda got up and served the casserole. It was warm, it was saucy, it was filling; he ate a second helping. 

“That was great, Amanda.”

“I’m glad you liked it. Let’s clean up and call the boys before it gets any later.”

The phone call was great; Philip and Jamie were anxious to talk to Lee again, since they had just seen their mom when she picked them up from school.

Amanda got her chance to speak to the boys as well, then asked to speak to their grandmother. After a quick check-in with her mother, Amanda hung up. 

It was now a bit past eight o’clock, and Lee found himself yawning. 

“Time for bed?” she asked, a bit nervous. She could offer to sleep on the couch, but that’s not what she really wanted. It had been so wonderful, sleeping in Lee’s arms during the Marvin’s case. She really wanted to experience that warm, safe feeling again. Plus, she would be nearby if Lee had any more dizzy spells or any other symptoms of the concussion.

He nodded. Standing up, he brought her hand to his lips and kissed it. “I’m going to go take a shower. I never got one today.”

She smiled at him. “Okay.” She looked around at the living room, making sure the door was locked and everything from dinner was put away. “I guess I’ll get ready for bed.”

He nodded. “Just use the bedroom to change. I’ll close the bathroom door and put my pajamas on in there after my shower.”

He went into his room and gathered his clothing, then went into the bathroom and closed the door.

Amanda put her suitcase on the bed and opened it up, pulling out her nightgown and her small bag of toiletries. She placed them on the bed and, glancing once at the bathroom door, started getting undressed. She heard the shower start up and tried not to think about Lee being just on the other side of the door, undressed. She finished taking off her clothes, then pulled the nightgown over her head. She had brought the pale blue one; she didn’t wear it very often anymore because she had special memories (okay, one special memory) attached to it, and she didn’t want constant wear and washing to destroy it. But she thought Lee would appreciate it.

She put her dirty clothes back in the suitcase and closed it up, then put it back against the wall near the bedroom door. She left the toiletries bag on the bed and went back out to the living room to retrieve her book from where she had left it on the coffee table earlier.

She was sitting on the bed, propped up by pillows, when Lee came out of the bathroom.

For a moment he just stopped and gazed at her, a smile growing on his lips.

“What?” Amanda felt a little self-conscious with Lee staring at her.

“I just—I can’t believe you’re here, after all this time…”

She smiled, a little amazed herself. Yes, they had shared a bed at the Foxrun Motel, but that had happened in the middle of the night, when they were both sleepy, and with no prior planning; this was deliberate, while they were still fully awake, and this was _Lee’s bed_. The magnitude of the step they were taking was a little overwhelming, even if she knew that nothing of a sexual nature was going to happen (she wouldn’t let it; not while he was still suffering the effects of the concussion).

“Two and a half years…”

He nodded. “I didn’t think it would ever happen. I never thought that you would ever be able to love someone like me.”

She nodded in understanding. “I never thought you’d ever see me as anything but a friend.”

Lee smiled at her. “I’m glad we were both wrong.” He walked toward her, holding out his hand. “Do you need a turn in the bathroom?”

She nodded and he grabbed her hand, pulling her up from her inclined position against the pillows. He dropped a quick kiss on her lips as she stood up next to him. Grabbing her toiletries bag off the nightstand, she walked into the bathroom. 

“There’s a washcloth and towel for you on the counter.” Lee called as she shut the door.

“Thank you,” he heard through the closed door.

He smiled, then turned on the nightstand lamp. Walking over to the doorway, he switched off the overhead light, then moved back next to the bed. He pulled back the bedding and sat on the edge of the bed, musing over his history with Amanda. He remembered how he had fought against working with her at first. Thank God that Billy had insisted.

Leaning back against the pillows, he thought about his years as an agent, and he realized that his mind now categorized everything as Before Amanda and After Amanda. He had had a successful career Before Amanda, but the best memories were all After Amanda. And now, he was looking forward to a future With Amanda.

As he lay contemplating that future, he heard the bathroom door open.

“Do you want the bathroom light on or off?”

He considered it. Usually he left it on, not liking the complete blackness of the room without it, but with her here… “You can turn it off.”

“Do you mind if I open the window a little?”

He smiled at her. “No, go ahead.”

She opened it about an inch, then came back to the bed. He held back the covers on her side in invitation. With a smile, she slid into the bed and he pulled the covers over them both. He propped his head up with his fist and looked at her nightgown. “That one has longer sleeves than the one you were wearing last time.” He remembered chafing her bare arms when she was cold in the middle of the night.

She placed her hand to her chest, gripping the fabric. She smiled in an almost bashful way. “I brought a couple with me, but this one…this one is the one I was wearing when we first met. Under my coat. At the train station.”

He smiled in amazement. “Really? I never saw it. Your coat covered it, and then I was a little busy with the goons chasing me.”

He reached toward her with one hand, urging her closer. “But that day turned out to be a good day after all.” Her mouth was only a fraction of an inch away from his. “I met you.”

Their lips met, softly at first, then with growing desire as they opened their mouths and explored with their tongues.

Gasping, Amanda pulled back before she let herself get too carried away, moving her lips to his cheek and jaw and dropping moist kisses on his skin.

He reciprocated, placing his talented lips against any bit of skin he could reach.

Regretfully, she gradually pulled back. “Lee.” She had to stop. Much more and she wouldn’t be able to. She placed her hands on his shoulders and looked in his eyes. “Lee, I love you, and I want you, but we can’t-- not while you’re still recovering from your concussion. I’d never forgive myself if anything bad were to happen…”

He closed his eyes and let out a long, slow breath, trying to control his heart rate. He silently nodded. He wasn’t sure if he could even answer in words right now. He’d never, ever wanted anyone like he wanted Amanda. It went beyond physical desire. He wanted to share everything of himself with her. He’d already shared more of his thoughts, emotions, and life with her than with anyone else, ever. She knew him like no one else ever had; she knew his heart. He wanted her to know the rest of him, too; a final sharing, and then no one else would have him that way ever again.

He let go of her with one hand and reached behind him to shut off the lamp on the nightstand. The almost complete darkness distracted him for a moment, and he felt Amanda’s lips on his cheek. He felt her shift forward, then her arm went around him, and her head nestled under his chin. The arm gave a squeeze, hugging him as best she could, and he felt her lips against his neck in a series of soft, dragging kisses. Finally, he rolled all the way over onto his back, bringing her with him so that her arm was stretched out over his ribs and her head was pillowed on his chest near his shoulder.

He took a couple deep breaths. Now that she wasn’t kissing him, maybe his heart would stop racing and maybe other parts of him would relax, too.

Her knee shifted, drawing itself up to rest on his thigh, and he held his breath until she stopped moving. 

“Goodnight, Lee. I love you.” Her voice sounded soft and husky, so near his ear.

“Goodnight, Amanda. I love you.” His voice sounded deeper and more gravelly than usual since her ear was pressed against his chest. She could feel the vibration of it through her entire body. Suppressing a shiver at the feeling, she attempted to relax, but only accomplished that task when she felt Lee’s hand on her back, rubbing soothing circles over the fabric of her nightgown.

**SMK**

Amanda woke early the next morning. They had shifted at some point during the night, and she was now turned away from Lee, his arm wrapped around her chest and his face buried in her neck.

She bit her lip to keep from moaning as she realized she felt his hips pressed up behind her, and it was obvious that part of him was awake even if the rest of him wasn’t.

It had been _so long_ since she had woken to feel an erection pressed into her. For a brief moment, she wondered if she should move away from him, but it felt so good to be pressed against him, she couldn’t bring herself to do it.

Lee shifted, and his arm moved up until one hand was cupping her breast. Her breath caught, and she closed her eyes. For a few minutes, she was able to savor the feelings he was inspiring in her, but then he moved again, and the brush of his hand against her nipple caused her to involuntarily moan.

The sound seemed to rouse Lee, and his hand flexed as he woke, causing another moan to escape her throat.

Suddenly, he froze. “Amanda, I’m sor—”

She brought her hand up to hold his in place, and he stopped speaking. “Don’t apologize.”

She subtly pressed her hips back against his, and this time he moaned.

She held his hand against her breast, marveling at how protective it felt, like he was holding all of her, body and soul.

She’d never felt this way with Joe, never trusted him with everything she was. But with Lee, she had already given him everything else. He’d already saved her life, had demonstrated more than once that he was willing to die for her. She trusted him with her life, and her sons’ lives. She yearned to give him the rest of her, and the stillness and care with which he held her right now felt like an acknowledgment of how precious he felt that gift was.

She didn’t know how she was going to get through the next several days without giving in to her desire for Lee, but she was also (maybe selfishly) unwilling to give up their sleeping arrangement. She didn’t want to go sleep on the couch or go home. So, they would just have to have some self-control.

She released his hand and shifted forward so that she had room to roll over and face him. She needed to see his face.

His hand had retreated to his own hip when she had dislodged it earlier, and she picked it up and again placed it against her chest, this time between her breasts, right over her heart.

Meeting his eyes, she pressed her hand against his so he could feel her heartbeat. “I want you to know that this is yours, and has been for a long time.”

He nodded solemnly. 

She moved his hand onto her breast. “The rest of me is yours, too, but I will not risk your health when waiting a few extra days can protect it.” She thought of the ruse they had played to make Brody think Lee had died in surgery. “When I had to pretend that you died a couple days ago, it reminded me of how it felt to lose you even when we’d only known each other a few months; it would be so much worse now, and I would never do anything that might increase that risk if I could help it.”

He took a deep breath and let it slowly out. “I love you, Amanda, and I will not do anything that will put either of us at unnecessary risk.” He took her other hand and pressed it against _his_ chest. “I am yours, body, heart, and soul.”

She gave him a radiant, if tearful smile, followed by a watery laugh. “Can you help me out with something, then?”

“Anything.”

“I don’t know if I am going to have the self-control to wait on my own, so I need your help.”

He swallowed noticeably, then nodded.

She took a deep breath. “It’s been a long, _long_ time since I’ve…well…you know…”

His eyes widened. “How long?”

“Since Joe. So, that’s…hmm… December…1981.”

His eyes got even wider. “More than four years?”

She nodded.

“And what-- what do you need my help with?” His voice sounded a bit strangled.

“Just—just make sure you have your own self-control, don’t count on me to do everything. I know you sometimes see me as this ‘paragon of purity,’ and that may subconsciously convince you that I can control myself in this instance, but _you_ …you could tempt a saint. I’m not a saint, Lee, and my feelings toward you are anything but pure.”

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Hearing how much she wanted him was doing wonders for his ego, but only made him want her more.

“I really don’t want to have to go sleep on the couch, but I will if that’s the only option.”

He nodded. “I’ll do my best. I really don’t want you to go sleep on the couch, either.”

She smiled at him, then leaned forward and kissed him gently on the lips. “Okay, then we should get up, and avoid temptation when we can…”

They each released the hand of the other, and Amanda rolled away from Lee to start the day.

**SMK**

Their previous day was the template for the next three days, with small variations. Amanda made three healthy meals a day, sometimes with Lee helping. He slept a lot, had the occasional headache, got irritable (though it was a cakewalk compared to the old Lee), got dizzy a few more times. She kept the apartment clean, kept Lee company and in relatively good spirits, ran errands, picked up Philip and Jamie from school, and brought them to their sports practices or made arrangements with other parents to take them. She made one trip to the Agency motor pool to switch out the obnoxious purple car with her own station wagon when Leatherneck called to tell her it was ready. Lee received a couple phone calls to see how he was doing, one from Billy and one from Francine. And every day, they made a call to Amanda’s house so that the boys (and Dotty, once) could talk to Lee (they continued to pretend that they wanted to talk to her, too, but she saw through their subterfuge). Sleeping and waking in the morning were difficult, since they inevitably ended up pressed together in one position or another, often straining their self-control to its limits. But they managed.

Lee called Dr. Scardelli to see when it would be safe for him to do ‘moderately strenuous activity’ and he said it should be safe after 24 hours with no headaches, dizziness, or nausea as long as the activity had a low risk of causing another concussion.

Lee responsibly told Amanda what Dr. Scardelli had said, and they were cautiously hopeful when by the fifth morning, he had not felt any side effects since the evening before.

On the fifth day, they got out of the apartment. Amanda drove them to a nearby park and they had a picnic lunch, then just relaxed and talked on the blanket in the sun for another hour. After stowing the picnic basket and blanket in the car, they took a little stroll around the park. They kept it slow and short, not wanting to press their luck and risk Lee getting another headache or dizzy spell.

After returning to the apartment, they relaxed for a while, and then Amanda went to pick up the boys from school and take them to practice. She reassured them that she and Lee would call that night, and then tomorrow after she picked them up from school, she would be staying home. She asked them what they wanted for dinner, and they decided on lasagna. She said she would invite Lee over for dinner if that was okay with them, and they were happy to invite him.

If Lee kept feeling okay, they were both scheduled to go back to work the following day, which was Friday. 

All day long, Amanda had tried to be careful of the touches she gave to Lee. It was impossible _not_ to touch him; at the park, they had held hands while walking, and she had pulled him down to lay his head in her lap as they talked on the blanket. While at the apartment, every time they passed each other, or sat next to each other, or helped with the cleaning up, there was some sort of touch given and received. She cherished every one; she had missed the little intimacies that came with a loving, attentive relationship. 

She loved touching Lee. She loved running her hands through his hair, holding his hand, kissing his forehead, placing her hand on his cheek when she looked into his eyes, drawing her hand across his shoulders as she passed him, putting her arm around his waist as they stood side-by-side.

He, too, seemed to enjoy touching. All throughout the day, he’d found excuses to do it. He’d caressed her fingers as she passed him dishes to dry after their meals, he’d brushed the hair back from her face when his head had been in her lap at the park, he’d leaned down and kissed her neck as he passed behind her when she sat reading on the couch. 

But she had been careful not to get too close for too long. She didn’t trust her own self-control and had tried to avoid any touch that would tempt them to go past the point of no return. Intellectually, she knew that a few hours either way would probably not make much difference to any risks. All the worry and planning were probably an excess of caution. But they had a schedule that they had established, of calling the boys after dinner and before bedtime, and she also knew that if they allowed themselves to get distracted before that, there was no way they would be able to keep that appointment.

They enjoyed a nice dinner of meatloaf, baked potatoes, and salad, then cleaned everything up. They made their phone call to the boys, who were excited about Lee coming over for dinner the following night. After hanging up, they looked at each other and smiled.

“You’re still feeling alright?” Amanda asked.

He nodded, reaching for her. As she willingly moved into his arms, she placed her hands on the sides of his face and looked into his eyes. “I love you.”

“And I love you, Amanda.” He swallowed almost nervously. “You’re sure you want to do this?”

She nodded. “More sure than I’ve ever been of anything.”

He let out a relieved breath, the smile that formed on his lips (and reached his eyes) taking her breath away.

She smiled back, happiness forming a sheen of liquid across her eyes, and she laughed in pure joy.

Their lips crashed together, and Lee walked Amanda backwards to the bedroom, never losing contact with her.

**SMK**

_Oh. My. Gosh._

That was the first thought that crossed her mind when she woke up the next morning, Lee’s naked flesh pressed against hers in a _very_ stimulating way. In fact, this was the same position they’d been in on Tuesday morning, with several notable exceptions. One: The lack of clothing made it into a completely different scenario. Two: Her body ached in so many wonderful ways that she wasn’t sure she’d be able to move away from the position. Three: She now knew what it was like to make love with Lee Stetson. Which made her feel like a completely different person, but somehow, at the same time, even _more_ of herself than she had been.

She closed her eyes, remembering the life-changing experience that was making love with Lee Stetson. She had thought she knew (mostly) what to expect. She had been married for years, given birth to two children. She and Joe had been relatively active in the early years, though trying to fit sex in to Joe’s busy school and work schedules had been a challenge. And once the boys were born, they presented more challenges in scheduling time together. But they had managed to make time, both of them enjoying their intimate activities. When Joe had gone to work for the EAO, it had been difficult adjusting to celibacy for most of the year, but when Joe came home in-between assignments, they had tried to make up for the months without. It was always good between them, and Amanda had willingly made love with him when he had come home right after Christmas in 1981, even knowing that she would be asking him for a divorce the next day. But that had been the last time she had been intimate with a man.

Until last night.

She had thought she had known what to expect. But with Lee, everything was different.

She shuddered lightly as she remembered how it had started out the night before. What that man could do with just his hands and mouth should be illegal. (In fact, it probably was in some states, so she was glad they were federal employees and didn’t have to enforce state laws.) And after they had removed all their clothing and fallen onto the bed…

_Heaven. It had been just like Heaven_. The touch of his skin against hers had been life-altering. She felt like her body was brand new; some new, amazing being that she had never inhabited before. It felt things that it had never felt before, so intensely, like she had only been half-awake when she had been with Joe, and now she was completely aware. All of her nerve endings were firing at the same time, like fireworks all over her body.

Her hands and mouth had been busy, too. Lee’s responses to her touch were so intense that he brought out a wildness in her, an uninhibited openness that allowed her to experience even more. He tasted amazing; she had dragged her lips all over his body, and he had done the same. Nothing could have prepared her for the sensations he brought out in her.

And then, when they finally joined their bodies… She had felt a completeness she had never felt before. Like her body was his home, and his was hers. They were physically as close as two people could be, and it was beautiful. Her emotions got the better of her, and a few tears had leaked out of her eyes. He had stopped moving and kissed the tears away, afraid that he was hurting her. She just shook her head and clasped him to her. “I just love you so much,” she had informed him, and with a relieved smile, he’d kissed her long and slow, then begun moving inside her again. “My Amanda…” he’d sighed.

And she thought she’d known what an orgasm entailed. But at Lee’s hands (and all his other parts), it was a work of art. A Masterpiece built layer by layer. She hadn’t known what her body was capable of until Lee played it like a virtuoso violinist with a Stradivarius. She was truly amazed (and grateful) her body hadn’t just exploded into a million pieces.

She felt him shift behind her as he began to wake up, his hand clasping her breast and his erection pressing into her bottom. He nuzzled into her neck, and she began to melt again.

**SMK**

They were late. It was their first day back at work after five days off, and they were late. They were supposed to check in with Billy before the morning briefing, and they weren’t going to make it.

Lee placed his hand on the small of her back and escorted her down the hall. They were walking quickly, but they couldn’t really make up for the time lost earlier.

As they walked into the bullpen, Lee looked around for Billy. _Damn!_ The meeting had already started. 

They quietly opened the door and slipped into the conference room. The only two empty seats were right at the front, making their tardy arrival obvious to everyone.

“Nice of you two to join us…” Billy gave them a look that said he would be talking to them later. Francine smirked at them, then got a suspicious look on her face as she glanced from one to the other.

After the briefing, they met with Billy in his office. “Is there anything you two would like to tell me?”

They looked at each other, then Amanda reached out and grabbed Lee’s hand, pulling it back toward her to rest on her lap, clasped tightly to hers. “No, sir. Sorry we were late, sir.”

Lee looked at where his hand was held so tightly by Amanda’s, then turned back to the section chief. “No, Billy. Nothing to report except that I’m fully recovered and ready to get back to work.”

“I see. So, Amanda took good care of you?” he asked Lee, trying not to smile.

“Oh, yeah, she took great care of me.” He smiled at his partner, and Amanda’s cheeks flushed.

Billy’s eyebrow rose, and he grinned. “Good, good. Well, you have your assignments, so I’ll let you get to them.”

“Yes, sir!” Amanda stood up, followed by Lee. Lee’s hand naturally fell to the spot on Amanda’s lower back and he escorted her out of the office.

Billy heard Amanda’s hoarse whisper and Lee’s smug response as the door was closing.

“I can’t believe you made us late on our first day back!”

“I told you one day I would make you completely lose track of time!”

Billy laughed out loud. Looked like the partnership of Scarecrow and Mrs. King had just gotten a lot more interesting…

* * *

**_Cassiopeia_ ** _by Sara Bareilles_

_Come in close now, it's time to tell a story  
Long ago and so many years before we  
Ever were, ever dreamed we even could be  
There was her and her very first heartbeat_

_All alone in the corner of the night sky  
Spiral bones of a supernova starlight  
Fell in love with another burning bright she  
Dreamed of a way to ignite she said,_

_Tonight  
Come on, come on collide  
Break me to pieces, I  
I think you're just like heaven why_

_Come on, come on collide  
Let's see what a fire feels like  
I bet it's just like heaven_

_Just like heaven  
Just like heaven_

_Such a shame  
nowhere near, even the near mist light years away  
From the hope of being sun-kissed anchored home  
in her interstellar sea but, poor lonely Cassiopeia  
So she sighs and she burns with desperation  
Learns to cry over love of constellations  
Then the spark from a star shooting too close  
They both smiled what a day to explode, she said_

_Tonight  
Come on, come on collide  
Break me to pieces, I  
I think you're just like heaven why_

_Come on, come on collide  
Let's see what a fire feels like  
I bet it's just like heaven_

_Just like heaven  
Just like heaven_

_Long ago in a sky built before us  
A supernova grew up to be stardust_


End file.
